Communicating with children of any age is probably the key parenting skill, as it helps build their self-esteem and confidence.
Through parenting we can prepare our children to survive and thrive in their environment. The environment that today’s society provides children is full of challenges and big issues like drugs, violence, and sex. That is why it is so important for children and parents to communicate openly.
Communication takes both talking and listening. Listening, instead of lecturing, gives children space to share their feelings, and by sorting through their own problems can help with their decision making skills. Further, good communication helps children develop confidence, feelings of self-worth, and good relationships with others.
At every age children need their parents to understand how they’re feeling. It’s your job to make your child feel that she can talk to you about anything going on in her life. You achieve this by listening properly and not leaping in with your own judgments or constantly blaming your child.
You want to be wise and prepared when you talk to your teen. Here are tips that can help. Good communication helps children and parents to develop confidence, feelings of self-worth, and good relationships with others. Try these tips:
Teach children to listen… gently touch a child before you talk… say their name.
Eat at least one meal together per day. Mealtime allows for two-way conversation and family bonding
Use time in the car wisely. Turn mom’s taxi service into an opportunity for stimulating conversation!
Speak in a quiet voice… whisper sometimes so children have to listen… they like this.
Host a family night each week. With a little effort, most families can set aside one evening per week for family activity.
Practice listening and talking: talk with your family about what you see on TV, hear on the radio or see at the park or store. (Talk with your children about school and their friends.)
Organize a 10-minute family time before bed each evening to cuddle on the sofa and affirm your love for your children.
Look a child in the eyes so you can tell when they understand… bend or sit down… become the child’s size.
Host family meetings to give your children a forum in which their input matters.
Express positive emotions. It takes more than just words to communicate positively. Studies show that only 7 percent of our message is through our words while 38 percent is through our tone of voice and 55 percent is through our posture and facial expressions!
Be conscious of how your communication affects your children. Children take cues from you as how to treat others in the family, as well as how to act outside the home.
Many parents only see their children when they’re at home. Get involved with your child’s school. Volunteer to help with extracurricular programs, such as theater or sports. You may discover new and wonderful aspects to your child that you otherwise would have missed.
Many parents know they have a troubled teen on there hands, as these warning signs will help tell. The question many parents have is “What do I do!” or “what are my options? If you have any suggestions for how to improve this site or any questions pertaining to this site, feel free to go:
http://www.abundantlifeacademy.us
http://www.abundantlifeacademy.info
http://www.troubledteens4jesus.com
It offers a wide variety of information pertaining to parenting teens in today’s society. They hope that the information presented on this site will be of some use to parents everywhere.
Tips on staying postive in a negative world?
The spring semester started about a month ago, it started out really tough for me. I was getting kicked out of my parents house (we are ok now, but I still had to move out, a mutual agreement), my labtop crashed, had to find/buy a car, get my loan signed, etc.etc. So anyway, heres my story. I was under a lot of stress in the beginning of the semester and as much as I tried to put on a mask (happy face) in front of my college peers, I couldn't help but show it. I finally begin to realize that a lot of people were feeding off of my sadness like a parasite. Has this happened to you before? They saw it as a opportune time to bully me pyschologically (as girls do all the time; catty). The girls were throwing mean remarks to me indirectly and I noticed a lot of nonverbal communications (body language) from them showing a sign of disrespect (i.e. blocking me from a circle by standing right in front of me while I'm speaking).
Well, I have to see these people for the next 2.5 yrs because I'm in the nursing program. Girls are evil man! Plus, I've moved out recently and been having the blues…I know this is normal but I want it to go away. I joined a club at school and joined a church in the hopes to surround myself around positive people. There are good people out there, but most girls my age (early 20s; i'm 23) are very insecure…and they feed off of other people's shortcomings. I'm not denying my insecurities, but I would never get a kick out of another person's sadness. There are just obvious signs that my classmates do not like me at all. Why do I care? I don't care much anymore like I used to but it bothers me because I have to see them so often.
They are not true friends, you dont need them. You will find friends that are there for you. Dont worry. Focus on yourself and what you can do to better yourself. You will be rewarded.
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…Having insight doesn't always help a situation suck less
! Hang in there! You are a fantastic woman and you will realize your dreams.
It is important to try to find other sources of support so you don't get burned out, so take a few social risks to do so…
There are lots of great tips for dealing with people who don't always deal in positivity – my favorite is to send them all love. Can't go wrong there, trust me on that! It'll come back to you.
I have been in a similar situation. This book really helped me (and I don't suggest books lightly):
http://www.amazon.com/Four-Agreements-Practical-Personal-Freedom/dp/1878424505/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-0612996-1733443?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1173160147&sr=8-1
At least consider reading about the four agreements on the internet. It changed my life anyhow.
If you are really struggling, consider seeking counseling. Many schools and communities offer free or reduced fee services if money is a problem. If worst comes to worst, you can (and should) ask local practitioners for a referral to a free or reduced cost service. You'll get help finding someone right for you pretty quick with that approach.
Stay strong, concentrate on celebrating your power and inner light (and not the power of those around you)!
I'll add you to my prayers for the night
.
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I just wanted to add (using copy and paste) a breif description of the four agreements (taken from a review on Amazon.com):
Be Impeccable With Your Word: Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.
Don't Take Anything Personally: Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.
Don't Make Assumptions: Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness, and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
Always Do Your Best: Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret.
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In a lot of ways, I sympathize with what you wrote…I know what it means to feel socially squeezed out and bullied in the context of a competitive program…
Everybody in this world gotta go through the same shet that u gotta go through. Even me. You gotta keep ur head straight always. To tell u the truth, people who are around u are not ur real loyal firends. B'cos they suppose to give a hand when ur down in ur case they kick u when ur down.
Don't listen to what other students say what's good what's not. Make ur Own decisin. Remember this: ( Make ur choices or else the choices will make u).
Do what u think is good. If u cannot cope up go for counciling. To let all ya stress out. One more thing start working alone in the gym without any friends; to get ur stress level down. Trust me It works.
One more thing just keep on going; Don't give up!! And try to stay away from the people who doesn,t give a shet about u. Stick wit da people who cares about u & give u a hand when u are down.
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go 2 peekvid and watch the movie the secret
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